“The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with oneself.” Mark Twain
Ultimately in life we are alone most of the time. Surrounded by others, we are still at one with our thoughts and feelings.
No one else “completes” us, like we do to ourselves. We carry our insecurities from childhood through adulthood. We act them out differently and learn to cover up our true insides. But we are still the one we must love and like to be able to feel happiness and love in our life. We cannot move on to a brighter more fulfilling spot until we become “comfy” with ourselves.
How can you get “comfy” with you?
1. Accept yourself for who you are. There is no right or wrong for personalities (as long as you aren’t an abuser or ax murderer). We all have a unique flair to present to the world. We all have sadness to bear. It’s OK. You don’t need to change a thing unless you want to. The one thing you need to do is to recognize who you are and accept yourself with all your goodness and badness. You are OK.
2. Allow yourself to be fallible. It’s unrealistic to think that you can go through life without making an error. Allow yourself to learn. Allow yourself to goof. Allow yourself to do your best at the moment.
3. Take responsibility only for your actions. In the event that you find something did not go as planned and caused distress, take responsibility for your actions. Fix it and move on with clear thinking. People are respected for how they react.
4. Respect yourself. You have a place in life. You need to hold your head high and honor yourself with respect. You are worthy. We are all equals. Feel it and live it.
5. Be confident. Feeling a sense of confidence within helps you to exude an inner comfort level. You are supposed to be where you are, doing what you are doing, and you are showing self-pride. Confidence is a matter of trusting in yourself, be sure that you are worthy, capable, and comfortable within your own skin. It is an intoxicating feeling.
6. Be secure enough to venture out. Sometimes when we are not comfortable within, we are scared to push out and take risks. We are afraid of choice and ridicule. Become more comfortable within yourself by trying new things, venturing out of your norm, and taking some risks. Start small. Understand that you are able to fix something if it doesn’t quite turn out as desired. You are able to handle what if’s in life.
7. Stop listening to everyone else and start listening to that voice inside of you. There is no shortage of people willing to run your life if you let them. It is time to turn off the voices of others and amp up that little voice inside of you with all of your wishes and desires. To get the life you want, you must listen to your voice.
8. Spend quality time with yourself. This sounds absurd because we are always within ourselves, but are we? How many of us hide in crowds or need people around us to have a good time? One needs to become pleased with their own company first. Plan to do some solo events. Have hobbies that you can do alone just for time to think. Become at ease with your own thoughts, your own breath, and your own company.
9. Learn to please yourself. Many of us have learned that a good life is in serving and helping others. We practice this to the exclusion of pleasing ourselves. We run circles to help others but fail to take ourselves into consideration. It’s time to be number one on your list. It’s time for the self. Bring attention and pamper yourself. What do you want and need?
10. Push aside mean things. We have wonderful memories for all the mean, nasty, hurtful things in life. It’s time to sweep the memory banks clean and replace them with the good, the loving, and the kind memories of life. Accept meanness as someone else’s problem. Do not give them power over you by focusing on negative. Come from goodness.
Live your dreams,